Saturday, September 29, 2007

Striking Gold

I love Entourage. And what makes this show tick? Jeremy Piven who plays the smarmy (yeah there's such a word, google it) Hollywood agent, Ari Gold. Ari's a bad ass motherfucker in a suit waiting to tell you how you screwed up because you didnt listen to his high and mighty advice. If you do manage to catch Entourage, you definitely won't be able to miss out on this loud mouthed 2 time Emmy nominated actor.

In the kicking the trend with my quote of the day, here are some quotes (yes plural, that's how i'm kicking the trend with this post) from Ari.

Josh: Hey Ari!
Ari: That's a great story.
Josh: How you doing? Crashing parties now?
Ari: You know Joshie here, I don't know if you guys know but he used to be my assistant.
Josh: That was a long time ago Ari.
Ari: What 14 months, that ain't that long. He used to make the best hazelnut latte. He was like a chemist in there, working. Just like mommy made. It was fantastic!
Josh: Hey man, ease up man it's a friggin' party here ok?
Ari: Does your boss know you're using his house? Because I put a call into him. He and I went to school together. I helped him cheat on his economics final. That's how he got his degree, he owes me big time.
Josh: You called my boss?
Ari: Absolutely. You know another class I took at Harvard? Business Ethics. I don't steal other people's mother fucking clients, but in your case I'm going to make an exception. I'm going to take everyone; your B-level sitcom stars, your reality-TV writers, when I'm done with you, you're gonna be repping sideshow freaks. You need Jo-Jo the Dog-Face-Bitch-Boy? Call Josh Weinfuck, the lightweight pen-stealing fuckface.

Ari: All right, when you talk to Dana, tell her I'm going to take the pictures from Cancun, and start a website called and there will be no password or fee required, and I will take out a full page ad in the LA Times promoting it. Tell her I want a fucking call back.

Ari: From now on ask my permission before you bang one of my assistants.
Eric: How'd you know that?
Ari: 'Cause I know all. And I could have told you that this would end badly. Now I gotta to fire her so you don't feel weird.
Eric: No. Don't fire her.
Ari: All right. Well, I'll just sexually harass her until she quits.

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